Assorted ruski moments
The blog hijacker strikes again with a list of highlights and lowlights from days 1-10...
Khachapuri, the tastiest cheesiest Georgian bread; dangerous 6 inch heels everywhere; bright orange hair-dye; vodka; vodka shots on overnight trains; vodka shots at Peirogi (the underground bookshop/bar with no street signage); photos; jumping action shots in squares; developing our international mediation skills; "cok" aka "juice"; cakes, cakes, cakes (that often look better than they taste); sour cream on everything; snacks; Porche 4x4s; Kafe Haus; being told off for swearing in church, for taking photos of saleswomen on trains; visa registration dramas; babushkas, Valery, Dennis, random punks in bars; face control; moody waitresses; the Moscow metro; massive blue eyeshadow; The Puma Jacket worn by Michelinska; Indian hippy veggie food and desserts; fruit sushi; Jaguar; Novgorod Theatre; the 45min kebab of tomato, cheese, capsicum, and onion; stalking strangers for photos of their heels/hairstyles; sunbaking at the Kremlin after a week of constant cloudy weather; drag queen videos at the Museum of Modern Art; free champers at the New Tretyakov Gallery; Socialist Realism at the New Tretyakov; someone sleeping through the Socialist Realism section of the New Tretyakov; singing in the streets; the Hermitage; great times.
Khachapuri, the tastiest cheesiest Georgian bread; dangerous 6 inch heels everywhere; bright orange hair-dye; vodka; vodka shots on overnight trains; vodka shots at Peirogi (the underground bookshop/bar with no street signage); photos; jumping action shots in squares; developing our international mediation skills; "cok" aka "juice"; cakes, cakes, cakes (that often look better than they taste); sour cream on everything; snacks; Porche 4x4s; Kafe Haus; being told off for swearing in church, for taking photos of saleswomen on trains; visa registration dramas; babushkas, Valery, Dennis, random punks in bars; face control; moody waitresses; the Moscow metro; massive blue eyeshadow; The Puma Jacket worn by Michelinska; Indian hippy veggie food and desserts; fruit sushi; Jaguar; Novgorod Theatre; the 45min kebab of tomato, cheese, capsicum, and onion; stalking strangers for photos of their heels/hairstyles; sunbaking at the Kremlin after a week of constant cloudy weather; drag queen videos at the Museum of Modern Art; free champers at the New Tretyakov Gallery; Socialist Realism at the New Tretyakov; someone sleeping through the Socialist Realism section of the New Tretyakov; singing in the streets; the Hermitage; great times.
J'ai teste pour vous....
... la automatique traduction!!
(and no this wasn't written by either Lisa, Freya or David! Who dared this horrible joke!!)
Après une semaine d'apprendre la Russie (avec André, l'instructeur de ski de Courchevel, entretenant la clientèle russe blingy bling) I a pensé i' ; d vous éclairent avec un cours accéléré de Russe. Vous pourriez avoir besoin de lui à un certain point, qui sait !
Leçon 1 : znayou de Ni = ' ; i don' ; t savent et f ** off" de k ; = ce que vous entendrez beaucoup, réponse commune à beaucoup de questions telles qu'où est la station de train ? quelle rue est ceci ? y a-t-il un café d'Internet tout près ? ce vin est-il meilleur que celui-là ? recommandez-vous les profiterolles ? etc….
Leçon 2 : prononciation de base ! ! la moitié des temps A sont O, O sont A, E sont YO ou le YE. Par exemple, l'ovochi (mes verts aimés) sont avochi prononcé (à moins qu'it' ; ovachi de s ! ! ? l'un des deux de toute façon). D'autres exemples utiles : le spassiba (=thanks) est spassibo écrit
Leçon 3 : la moitié des mots (et 99% de noms de rue et 76.8% de stations de métro) ont skaya à l'extrémité. S'incertain, ajoutez - skaya à la fin de chaque mot et si tout va bien elle semblera raisonnable ! ! Ex : excuse me' ; skaya, vous font know' ; skaya si là is' ; kaya un funkiskiyi (variante masculine - de skaya) bar' ; iskiyi qui sert-iskyi cockail-iskiy bon marché-isky
Quoi qu'il en soit, that' ; s il pour pas mais revenu bientôt parce que… peut-être… qui sait…. il pourrait bientôt y a une étude comparative dans la canalisation entre Tchaikovsky' ; s (voyez - le ciel encore, et moi parient que sa soeur était Tchaikovskaya !) Lac swan comme perfomerd par le Bolshoi (bAlshoi prononcé !) ballet et le ballet de Kremlin. Après 4 ans de binge le boire, noçant sur le ballet est mon remède !
(and no this wasn't written by either Lisa, Freya or David! Who dared this horrible joke!!)
Après une semaine d'apprendre la Russie (avec André, l'instructeur de ski de Courchevel, entretenant la clientèle russe blingy bling) I a pensé i' ; d vous éclairent avec un cours accéléré de Russe. Vous pourriez avoir besoin de lui à un certain point, qui sait !
Leçon 1 : znayou de Ni = ' ; i don' ; t savent et f ** off" de k ; = ce que vous entendrez beaucoup, réponse commune à beaucoup de questions telles qu'où est la station de train ? quelle rue est ceci ? y a-t-il un café d'Internet tout près ? ce vin est-il meilleur que celui-là ? recommandez-vous les profiterolles ? etc….
Leçon 2 : prononciation de base ! ! la moitié des temps A sont O, O sont A, E sont YO ou le YE. Par exemple, l'ovochi (mes verts aimés) sont avochi prononcé (à moins qu'it' ; ovachi de s ! ! ? l'un des deux de toute façon). D'autres exemples utiles : le spassiba (=thanks) est spassibo écrit
Leçon 3 : la moitié des mots (et 99% de noms de rue et 76.8% de stations de métro) ont skaya à l'extrémité. S'incertain, ajoutez - skaya à la fin de chaque mot et si tout va bien elle semblera raisonnable ! ! Ex : excuse me' ; skaya, vous font know' ; skaya si là is' ; kaya un funkiskiyi (variante masculine - de skaya) bar' ; iskiyi qui sert-iskyi cockail-iskiy bon marché-isky
Quoi qu'il en soit, that' ; s il pour pas mais revenu bientôt parce que… peut-être… qui sait…. il pourrait bientôt y a une étude comparative dans la canalisation entre Tchaikovsky' ; s (voyez - le ciel encore, et moi parient que sa soeur était Tchaikovskaya !) Lac swan comme perfomerd par le Bolshoi (bAlshoi prononcé !) ballet et le ballet de Kremlin. Après 4 ans de binge le boire, noçant sur le ballet est mon remède !
Pa-rouski
After a week of learning Russia (with Andre, the ski instructor from Courchevel, servicing the bling blingy Russian clientele) i thought i'd enlighten you with a crash course in Russian. You might need it at some point, who knows!
Lesson 1: ni znayou = 'i don't know and f**k off" = What you will hear a lot, common answer to a lot of questions such as where is the train station? what street is this? is there an internet cafe nearby? is this wine better than that one? do you recommend the profiterolles? etc...
Lesson 2: basic pronounciation!! half of the times A are O, O are A, E are YO or YE. For example, ovochi (my beloved greens) are pronounced avochi (unless it's ovachi!!? one of the two anyway). Other useful examples: spassiba (=thanks) is spelt spassibo
Lesson 3: half of the words (and 99% of street names and 76.8% of metro stations) have skaya at the end. If unsure, add -skaya to the end of each word and hopefully it will make sense!! Ex: excuse me'skaya, do you know'skaya if there is'kaya a funkiskiyi (masculine variant of -skaya) bar'iskiyi that serves-iskyi cheap-isky cockail-iskiy
Lesson 4: in Russian, if you're female, you're either a devuchka (young lady) or a babucka (granny). Nothing in between! Choose your camp!
Anyway, that's it for not but come back soon because... maybe... who knows.... there might soon be a comparative study in the pipeline between Tchaikovsky's (see -sky again, and i bet his sister was Tchaikovskaya!) Swan Lake as perfomerd by the Bolshoi (pronounced bAlshoi!) ballet and the Kremlin Ballet. After 4 years of binge drinking, binging on ballet is my remedy!
Lesson 1: ni znayou = 'i don't know and f**k off" = What you will hear a lot, common answer to a lot of questions such as where is the train station? what street is this? is there an internet cafe nearby? is this wine better than that one? do you recommend the profiterolles? etc...
Lesson 2: basic pronounciation!! half of the times A are O, O are A, E are YO or YE. For example, ovochi (my beloved greens) are pronounced avochi (unless it's ovachi!!? one of the two anyway). Other useful examples: spassiba (=thanks) is spelt spassibo
Lesson 3: half of the words (and 99% of street names and 76.8% of metro stations) have skaya at the end. If unsure, add -skaya to the end of each word and hopefully it will make sense!! Ex: excuse me'skaya, do you know'skaya if there is'kaya a funkiskiyi (masculine variant of -skaya) bar'iskiyi that serves-iskyi cheap-isky cockail-iskiy
Lesson 4: in Russian, if you're female, you're either a devuchka (young lady) or a babucka (granny). Nothing in between! Choose your camp!
Anyway, that's it for not but come back soon because... maybe... who knows.... there might soon be a comparative study in the pipeline between Tchaikovsky's (see -sky again, and i bet his sister was Tchaikovskaya!) Swan Lake as perfomerd by the Bolshoi (pronounced bAlshoi!) ballet and the Kremlin Ballet. After 4 years of binge drinking, binging on ballet is my remedy!
Out'derground
Fab photos of the actual underground to follow! Watch this space
Photos du dedans du mecrot a suivre. C'est tres tres beau!
Photos du dedans du mecrot a suivre. C'est tres tres beau!
Special edition: guest post
JC's top-10 new best friends (a guest entry by Lisa and Freya, traveling comrades for the first 10 days)...
1. Anna (but really, her hotter than hot bro), who let us test our abilities to argue a point - and to make up our own exchange rate when it suits. These abilities which would be tested time and time again
2. The waitress JC developed a crush on (despite her hairstyle), who lulled us into a false sense of security then unleashed a mega-tantrumon us after a little misunderstanding over the wine. Yikes! Location: Novgorod's only restaurant open at 22h00 on a Wednesday night
3. Valery, a Russian military pilot who needed company while downing numerous vodka shots on the overnight train to Moscow (candidates included anyone willing to listen to him speak English at a rate of 10 words a minute)
4. Leo, a young (married, sadly) ballet dancer masquerading as a computer programmer, also on the overnight train
5. Dennis, a mind-reading Montenegran para-psychologist, who doesn't know what he believes but is undoubtedly right about everything, and who likes Japanese food but will also buy everyone a Russian buffet whether they like it or not
6. The babushka flatmate who cooks JC porridge every morning in Moscow, and leaves incomprehensible notes that are conveniently backed up with drawings for the non-literate
7. The pianist in bar 44 who invited JC to sing a duet of "Moscow Moscow" to the tune of "New York New York"
8. Jaguar Bar, located next door to the stunning Novgorod Theatre, which is not just any lump of concrete (that's the Intourist hotel next door)
9. Anyone selling half-edible cakes or pastries, whether they're dry, tasteless or just plain creamy
10. The dyevushka (young Russian female) who may be so lucky as to receive JC as her own personal fashion consultant. Some principles of dyevushka style include: 4 inch heels, anything too tight or too sheer, no differentiation between day- and evening-wear, and a frightening array of hair dye
1. Anna (but really, her hotter than hot bro), who let us test our abilities to argue a point - and to make up our own exchange rate when it suits. These abilities which would be tested time and time again
2. The waitress JC developed a crush on (despite her hairstyle), who lulled us into a false sense of security then unleashed a mega-tantrumon us after a little misunderstanding over the wine. Yikes! Location: Novgorod's only restaurant open at 22h00 on a Wednesday night
3. Valery, a Russian military pilot who needed company while downing numerous vodka shots on the overnight train to Moscow (candidates included anyone willing to listen to him speak English at a rate of 10 words a minute)
4. Leo, a young (married, sadly) ballet dancer masquerading as a computer programmer, also on the overnight train
5. Dennis, a mind-reading Montenegran para-psychologist, who doesn't know what he believes but is undoubtedly right about everything, and who likes Japanese food but will also buy everyone a Russian buffet whether they like it or not
6. The babushka flatmate who cooks JC porridge every morning in Moscow, and leaves incomprehensible notes that are conveniently backed up with drawings for the non-literate
7. The pianist in bar 44 who invited JC to sing a duet of "Moscow Moscow" to the tune of "New York New York"
8. Jaguar Bar, located next door to the stunning Novgorod Theatre, which is not just any lump of concrete (that's the Intourist hotel next door)
9. Anyone selling half-edible cakes or pastries, whether they're dry, tasteless or just plain creamy
10. The dyevushka (young Russian female) who may be so lucky as to receive JC as her own personal fashion consultant. Some principles of dyevushka style include: 4 inch heels, anything too tight or too sheer, no differentiation between day- and evening-wear, and a frightening array of hair dye
Test
A quoi sert mon blog? Est que au moins une ame perdue le consulte? Parviens-je a changer le monde? Qui suis-je? Ou vais-je? Dans quelle etagere!?
Merci de laisser un commentaire si vous avez la reponse a l'une de questions ci-dessus?
What's the point of me blogging? Does at least one lost soul read it? Am i making the world a better? Who am i? where am i going? on which book shelf (if you don't get this one, it's because u don't speak French, shame on ya!)?
Leave a comment if you have the answer to any of the above? (before i lose the will to live, right Lisa / Freya ;-) ?)
Merci de laisser un commentaire si vous avez la reponse a l'une de questions ci-dessus?
What's the point of me blogging? Does at least one lost soul read it? Am i making the world a better? Who am i? where am i going? on which book shelf (if you don't get this one, it's because u don't speak French, shame on ya!)?
Leave a comment if you have the answer to any of the above? (before i lose the will to live, right Lisa / Freya ;-) ?)
Bored / on s'ennuie
What do three people bored on a big Russian square? Answer below!
Que font 3 personnes qui s'ennuient sur une grande place russe? reponse ci-dessous!
Que font 3 personnes qui s'ennuient sur une grande place russe? reponse ci-dessous!
Russia Day 5
Things that i've learnt so far:
you're not good at haggling, you're too soft, and as such, you need to toughen up in this sharks' world!! Although the fliiping side of the coing might be that i trust people and i believe that there is something good in each and everyone of us!
Other lesson is that most wars are born out of misunderstandings. Even with a screaming Russian waitress
6-inch white boots: 150 rubles, chihuahua in red and yellow coat: 899 rubles, bad hair dye: 6 rubles, badly cut jeans with lots of sequins: 149.99 rubles, looking cheap on a platform in the middle of Russia: priceless!
Yes, juice in Russian is spelled Cok, no it's not funny!
Yes, chicken and kitchen are two different things, and yes it's funny when a silly waitress says one for the other hihihi!
you're not good at haggling, you're too soft, and as such, you need to toughen up in this sharks' world!! Although the fliiping side of the coing might be that i trust people and i believe that there is something good in each and everyone of us!
Other lesson is that most wars are born out of misunderstandings. Even with a screaming Russian waitress
6-inch white boots: 150 rubles, chihuahua in red and yellow coat: 899 rubles, bad hair dye: 6 rubles, badly cut jeans with lots of sequins: 149.99 rubles, looking cheap on a platform in the middle of Russia: priceless!
Yes, juice in Russian is spelled Cok, no it's not funny!
Yes, chicken and kitchen are two different things, and yes it's funny when a silly waitress says one for the other hihihi!
Alaska?
For those who wonder why my blog is called what it is called
Pour ceux qui se demande l'origine du nom de mon blog!
Mais aussi:
And also, for the francophones / philes:
2 films that i really loved this year, 1 new jc
2 de mes films preferes de 2008, 1 nouveau jc
Pour ceux qui se demande l'origine du nom de mon blog!
Mais aussi:
And also, for the francophones / philes:
2 films that i really loved this year, 1 new jc
2 de mes films preferes de 2008, 1 nouveau jc
Day 1 of my new life
Safe and sound in St Pete. Started off crap with no veggie meal on flight (drama!) but it's a new life, with a new jc, and i've decided to be cooler about these things and to enjoy life to the max
Bien arrive a Saint-Petersbourg malgre un incident de parcours: pas de repas veggie pour Bibi dans l'avion mais nouvelle vie = nouveau jc dc j'ai decide d'etre plus relax et de voir la vie du bon cote!!
Am going to Alaska!
Bien arrive a Saint-Petersbourg malgre un incident de parcours: pas de repas veggie pour Bibi dans l'avion mais nouvelle vie = nouveau jc dc j'ai decide d'etre plus relax et de voir la vie du bon cote!!
Am going to Alaska!
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